IVF Is a Full-Time Job: How to Split the Tasks With Your Partner
Written by Syd Brickey, founder of WeFertility
Last updated: October 12, 2026
Get the tasks out of your heads and into one shared app where every step has an owner. That's how you divide and conquer IVF, and it's exactly why we built WeFertility.
My wife Gina and I learned this the hard way. Here's what IVF actually looks like, what happened to us, and how I'd set it up if we were starting over tomorrow.
Why does IVF feel like a full-time job?
Because it is one. And nobody tells you that going in.
On top of the jobs you already have, you're juggling:
- Monitoring appointments and bloodwork, usually first thing in the morning
- Calls and emails with the clinic, the pharmacy, and insurance
- Steps that have to happen in a certain order
- Counseling sessions, legal items, and consent forms
- Acupuncture, meditation, whatever keeps you sane
- Bills, reimbursements, and receipts
- Documents you'll be asked for again. And again.
Every bit of it is time-sensitive. You only get one chance a month.
What happened to us
Gina and I both work corporate jobs. I'm in sales and paid on commission, so every hour away from work costs us something.
Gina was carrying, so she became the point person with our clinic. She was calling. She was emailing. She was going to appointments and acupuncture and trying to stay calm through all of it. It was a second job.
Our clinic handed us a list of steps that had to happen in a certain order. The follow-up emails were cryptic. It felt like a moving target. Then they lost our documents.
Some of our biggest wins came from Gina asking questions early. When three rounds of IUI didn't work and we pivoted to IVF, she found out our clinic shuts down over December and early January. Because she asked, we started in November. That saved us about two months.
Then the bills. Our egg retrieval medication was about $9,000 at the pharmacy. No warning, no time to pause. Later, on a family trip in Florida, bills hit three days in a row: $2,000. $4,000. $3,000.
We realized this was a full-time job, most of it was falling on Gina, and there was no good way to share it. So we built one.
How do you divide and conquer IVF tasks with WeFertility?
Every step gets an owner. Everyone can see what's next. No more "did you call them back?"
| What needs doing | How it works in WeFertility |
|---|---|
| Clinic steps | Add each step as a task, in the order your clinic gives them. See what's active, what needs attention, what's blocked, and what's done. |
| Who does what | Assign each task to you, your partner, or a support person. |
| Appointments | Sync to the calendar you already use. |
| Bills | Log bills as they hit, see spending by category, and track pending reimbursements. |
| Tax time | Export your expenses. |
| Documents | Upload your own copies so you're never waiting on the clinic. |
| Support people | Invite them and control who sees what. |
What I'd tell any couple starting out:
- Be mindful of the carrying partner. Pick up what you can for them.
- Hand off the calls. Insurance, pharmacy, and billing can go to whoever has time that week.
- Check in once a week. Fifteen minutes, app open. What's active, what needs attention, what's blocked.
What can the non-carrying partner take on?
A lot. As the non-carrying partner, I couldn't do the retrievals or the bloodwork. But insurance calls, pharmacy questions, bills, reimbursements? None of that has to come from the person being poked and monitored. Assign those tasks to yourself, and your partner can see they're handled without having to ask.
How do you bring in support people?
People want to help. They just don't know how. Invite them in and give them something real: a ride to monitoring, dinner on retrieval day, a pharmacy pickup.
If you're working with a known donor, they have steps too. Our clinic required counseling for the two of us together, each of us separately, and with our donor. Add those sessions as tasks so everyone knows what's coming, and choose what each person can see.
Checklist: set up before your first IVF cycle
- Download WeFertility and invite your partner
- Ask your clinic about shutdown periods and add the dates
- Add every step your clinic gives you, in order
- Assign each task to a person
- Connect your calendar
- Price medications early, and look for nonprofit help before you start
- Upload copies of every document
- Log bills and reimbursements as they come in
- Invite support people and pick what they can see
This is our experience, not medical or legal advice. Talk to your clinic, attorney, or tax professional.
How WeFertility helps
WeFertility remembers, so you don't have to. Try it free for 30 days, then it's less than a coffee a month. Less time managing IVF, more time with each other. Download WeFertility on the App Store.
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